What's in a blurb?
The dreaded back-of-the-book blurb.
I was already two years into my self publishing journey when I learned I was doing blurbs ALL WRONG. So in the spirit of never gate keeping, I’m passing this info on to you. In my article about book covers, I explained that covers are your primary marketing tool. The blurb is in the top three tools as well. A cover might make someone click on a link, but if the blurb isn’t appealing, they likely won’t purchase.
(No, I’m not a marketing or publishing expert, so always take my advice with a grain of salt—just something that’s potentially worth looking into.)
If you’re not sure what I’m referring to, this is all about the paragraph or two we put on the back cover of a book (and in sales listings) about the story itself. (The story summary you might send with a query letter is an entirely different thing!) I used to make three mistakes with mine, and I see these mistakes all the time on indie books.
Mistake 1: The blurb summarizes the entire book.
Mistake 2: Partly due to the nature of mistake 1, the blurb is too long / wordy.
Mistake 3: Including too many specific details (which can also contribute to mistake 2).
I’ll go through each mistake, and then provide a couple of examples via actual blurbs.
Mistake 1: The question is, what is a blurb supposed to DO? And the answer ISN’T: summarize the whole book. The answer IS: the blurb is supposed to give the reader just enough info to pull them in, spark their curiosity and/or evoke emotion, in order to make them want to purchase/read the book. If you summarize the entire story, it does a couple things you DON’T want: spoils elements of the plot, and overwhelms the potential reader with too much info.
Mistake 2: Keep it short! You know how short attention spans are nowadays, right? SO short. Keep that in mind with your blurb. My longest blurb currently sits at 204 words, including the tag line and the comps my publisher tacked on to the end. I’d say aiming for around 150 words is great, and 250+ words is almost always too long.
Mistake 3: The reader doesn’t need to know the name of every character, setting, etc. This is a mistake I probably see the most with indie fantasy novels. These details, in this instance, are distracting and sometimes overwhelming. As enchanted as we are with our own worlds, our readers don’t need all the details up front.
So now we’ll look at an early draft of my blurb for Luxe in Between. First of all, it’s over 250 words and summarizes far too much of the story. Some of the info I could have left out will be in bold.
In the first installment of Luxe’s Lullaby Trilogy, Niamh Luxe Finnegan’s life takes a bewildering turn. Grieving the loss of her beloved aunt to cancer, Luxe inherits Hecate’s, her aunt’s occult supply store. As she prepares to resume her graduate studies in the fall, she carries the weight of an unanswered question that has haunted her for two decades – the mysterious disappearance of her parents while on vacation.
A stranger named Soren walks into her store one day to share a revelation that shatters Luxe’s understanding of her own identity. He discloses a truth that rocks her world: she is not merely a mortal but a unique hybrid, half witch from her mother’s lineage and half fae, for her father is none other than the prince and heir of the fae realm.
Luxe’s transformation into her newfound heritage is swift and bewildering, as her latent magical powers surface. A chilling prophecy unravels: she is destined to lead a fae rebellion against the ruthless fae queen–who also happens to be the grandmother who wants her dead.
With her life teetering on a precipice, Luxe is thrust into a world of magic, danger, and ancient intrigue. Alongside Soren, she flees from the relentless pursuit of the fae queen and, on her journey, encounters Alistair and Calix, two high fae who pledge their loyalty to her cause.
As Luxe’s powers grow, she must harness her newfound abilities to fulfill her destiny, unite the fae against their oppressive queen, and reclaim her rightful place in the realm she never knew existed. In this story, magic, destiny, and heritage entwine to build a spellbinding narrative that will captivate your imagination and leave you yearning for more.
A lovely author friend, Amy Nova, helped me understand how to rework my blurbs. She recommended using (part of) Pixar’s story structure, known as the Story Spine, to help draft blurbs (with a few tweaks, explained below):
1. Once upon a time there was __________.
2. Every day _____________
3. Until one day ________________ (the inciting incident)
4. Because of that _______________ (because of that inciting incident something happens)
5. Because of that _______________
6. Because of that ________________
7. Until Finally ____________ (the climax of the story)
8. And ever since then _______ (when things go back to normal)
The primary thing you’ll change about this is you won’t include 7 and 8 as such, or you’ll only hint at them, maybe using a question format that hints at the stakes: “Can our heroine save the kingdom without losing herself?”
My more recent tagline and blurb (prior to the publisher making more edits) is as follows and sits at 154 words:
A prophecy…
A ruthless queen…
Three hot fae males…
And Luxe, in between.
After her parents’ mysterious disappearance, Luxe’s sole family is her aunt Rhea. When Rhea passes, Luxe is determined to keep her aunt’s business alive and to finish grad school, despite her debilitating grief.
But when Luxe reopens her aunt’s shop, a handsome, mysterious stranger appears and divulges secrets about her parents and herself that change Luxe’s life irrevocably. Unbeknownst to both of them, his actions trigger the latch of the proverbial Pandora’s Box, unleashing Luxe’s magic, a prophecy… and a sinister threat to Luxe’s life.
On the run, Luxe soon finds herself surrounded by a total of three beautiful fae males, all determined to impress and protect her. While that’s sweet and all, Luxe wonders if she’ll ever be able to control her magic and protect herself. And, most importantly, can she rescue her sole remaining parent before it’s too late?
Let’s break it down with the Story Spine:
Once upon a time… there was an orphan named Luxe who just lost her only remaining family.
Every day… she deals with her grief as she tries to run her aunt’s business and finish grad school.
Until one day… a stranger enters her life and drops a truth bomb that changes everything.
Because of that… her powers surface, and she doesn’t know how to use them.
And also because of that… she has to flee from her home.
And also because of that… she ends up meeting two more fae males who join her cause.
Until finally… she must learn to use her magic, evade the forces trying to end her, and try to rescue her parent.
n/a.
If you made it all the way through, I applaud your perseverance! 😅There was no way to explain this in a super short format, but I do think it’s info that could help a lot of authors, so it was worth sharing.
Speaking from a reader’s perspective, I never buy a book without reading the blurb. How much does the blurb affect YOUR decision to read a book?? If you’re an author, how difficult did you find writing your blurb to be?
P.S. Another important marketing tool for those of us selling books online (ie most of us) is KEY WORDS. I am not well versed enough in this area to write up an article, but I know someone who is: the above mentioned Amy Nova, who has also worked in digital marketing for 20+ years. Amy, Ash Wren, and I will be doing an Indie Visible live on Tiktok all about how to utilize key words on platforms like Amazon. Details:
Platform: Tiktok
Host: Amy (handle: anovawrites)
Date: Thursday Dec 11
Time: 6pm PST / 9pm EST
Unfortunately that format only works for certain genres and story types. I agree there should be some cause-and-effect in the blurb, but if the story has nothing before the inciting incident, then points 1, 2, and 3 can’t really be used. Otherwise it’s a good idea, and your revised blurb is way better. :)